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Limp Dick

October 4, 2009


I watched the Dick go limp right before my eyes and I enjoyed it immensely!

Never have I uttered those words before but I look forward to more opportunities to say them. Just to be clear, the Dick I’m talking about is the “illustrious” Chicago Mayor Richard J. Daley.

“Dick” has bare handedly manipulated the city of Chicago as the undefeated mayor for 20 years. Urban legends allege he even paid the two Black candidates who ran against him in the last election to split the Black vote and secure his seat in the 5th floor office.

But on Friday the International Olympic Committee said, “Nope – we’re not the ones”, when they eliminated Chicago from the possibility of hosting the 2016 games during the very first round of voting. Woo hoo!

Maybe now Dick can muster as much time and money as he did trying to secure the Bid, for trying to secure Chicago.

City crime is up and Chicago is on the way (if she hasn’t arrived already) of claiming the ill-distinguished title of Murder Capital of the Country.

Just this past month the brutal video taped murder of 16-year-old honor student Derrion Albert made national news. What did not make national news are the high numbers of similar crimes occurring in Chi-Town on the regular.

Since September 2008, 36 Chicago Public School Students have been murdered, by school-aged killers. Most of the murders have been executed by drive by shootings, however 16-year-old honor student Derrion Albert was beaten to death and this past May 15-year old Alex Arellano was beaten, shot and set on fire!

Dick wanted to light an Olympic torch when there are people in his city lighting children on fire… Is it just me or are the priorities a little askew? Now I get it when Mother’s remind their sons, “Baby, don’t think with your Dick.”

While Dick was busy romancing the IOC a Chicago Catholic Church has been flying it’s U.S. flag upside-down (an official signal of distress according to the U.S. Code of Laws regarding how to fly the flag) in hopes of getting more attention and more action allocated to solve the city’s gun violence problem.

Then there is/was Michael Reese Hospital – a once giant force to be reckoned with, in the ranks of renowned trauma centers. Today sits under the wrecking ball. Dick pretty much offered up it’s prime lakefront land to build “Olympic Village” – luxury housing for the 2016 Olympians and such, to be turned into UN-affordable housing once the games ended. Translation: Let me complete the final phase of gentrification in the once predominately mid to low income Black community (Bronzeville) and further push out of the city anyone who would mobilize to push me out of city hall like they mobilized in the early 1980’s electing Harold Washington who would still be mayor of Chicago today had it not been for his sudden fatal heart attack, then I can give the jabillion dollar construction contract to my brother-in-law’s construction company Walsh Construction ‘cause they get to build almost everything in the city and they know who to call if you need to make an airport disappear in the middle of the night!


Now that Dick has gone limp as he was about to thrust deep into the 2016 Olympic Games, he will have time to lube and stroke every number of Chicago pandemics. If he rides is just right using all the stamina he used in hopes of securing the Bid I’m confident Dick will bring a satisfying resolution to the things that real Chicagoans tell me they care about. Oh I don’t know let’s say things like:
Rising Crime Rate
Gun Violence
School Aged Murder Victims Killed by School Aged Murderers
The Chicago Public Schools
Is the expensive and imported Police Superintendent Jody Wiess a cy-borg – he doesn’t look real – maybe that’s what’ up with the crime rate
Is Ron Huberman your secret love child – he gets all the good city jobs
Highest National Sales Tax 10.25%
Parking Meter Fiasco
Chicago Transit Authority
Stop the Wrecking Ball and save Michael Reese Hospital
Diamond and Tionda Bradley are still missing


Dick, if you put your back into it and sweat it out I know you can make it all come together.

There will be menthols on the nightstand when you are done.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. October 4, 2009 10:05 am

    Thanks for getting this info out to non-Chicagoans. Had no idea.

  2. Joe Isuzu permalink
    October 5, 2009 8:28 pm

    Hey Rouge, I just found your blog. LOVE IT! Well done.

  3. November 28, 2009 10:09 am

    Girl :great post and writing!!!!

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